Turn Around When Possible

‘Turn around when possible.’

It was a widescreen SatNav, but he relied on Jane’s calm voice to guide them. He’d invested in the device after Rudolph got them lost last year over Papua New Guinea – the old boy was losing his sense of navigation.

Jane didn’t understand about flight paths.

She had guided them into Gatwick’s flight paths.

Time was, he used to prepare his route beforehand, but he’d come to rely too much on Rudolph. He would have to circle and come in closer to the rooftops. They should still clear the Shetlands before daybreak though.

They touched down on the first roof of the village and a loose tile skittered to the ground. While Rudolph held the sleigh steady, he made the delivery. Returning, he fell into the driving seat. They must be making sherry stronger these days.

He banished an unwelcome vision of his doctor frowning.

North of Hadrian’s Wall, port and sherry had given way to good Scotch whisky. Weary now, he squinted at the SatNav, struggling to focus as he keyed in…

B…

A…

That looked like Balmoral, halfway down the list that appeared. While the SatNav was still calculating the quickest route, he steered Rudolph towards familiar treetops. Through a haze, the imposing buildings drew nearer.

‘Turn around when possible.’

‘B*****!’

A crop of new aerials had sprouted where he landed last year.

The eastern sky was a lighter shade of black, and his head was throbbing.

‘Turn around when possible.’

He tapped the screen and it changed; that wasn’t what he’d intended!

‘Turn around when possible.’

He tore the thing from its mounting and threw it.

The small boy had sneaked out to look for Santa. Bending to adjust his corgi slippers, he didn’t notice the falling SatNav gathering speed as it approached.

by Cathy Cade