Feel Free
“Passengers for
flight EZY8691 to Las Palmas please make your way to gate 69. The flight is
ready to board”.
In my chest my
heart was thumping with excitement. It
is incredible that people around me could not hear the noise it was
making. “This is my flight. I am going to Gran Canaria”. I thought with
exhilaration whilst making my way to Gate 69.
I had finally
managed it. It had taken me 6 months of
savings to afford a break in Las Palmas.
This was my treat for my 50th birthday and I will be celebrating it in
Spain.
I still had
difficulty realising that I was at Gatwick Airport, on my own, ready to board a
flight to a destination I had never been to.
If it had not been for the documentary I had seen on the special beaches
and the sand dunes in Las Palmas, I would never have thought of going there.
Not mentioning the unusual night clubs with the flamboyant characters that
performed there every night of the tourist season.
I positively felt like Shirley Valentine. I was
20 years old when I had seen that film in the late 80s. I had just got together
with Chris, who was 32, so I could not understand why Shirley would want to go
on holiday on her own, leaving her husband behind. But after 28 years with Chris, I knew why she
had needed to do that. Like her, I
wanted to experience how it felt to feel free whilst I was still young enough
to enjoy it and wise enough to make the most of it. I wanted to find who I was
and what I was capable of outside of my relationship with Chris. Because of course this trip will be a game changer
for sure. This was an experience my
heart had hankered for practically all my life but had not had the courage to
go for.
Well in a few
hours, I would land in Las Palmas, go to the hotel, have dinner and spend my
first night abroad. Then in the
glorious, sunny morning I will make my way to one of the most stunning,
secluded, sandy beaches in Las Palmas.
My heart literally flew out of my body, I was that excited.
Of course I felt
a twinge of guilt too as I had just left a note for Chris on the kitchen table
to say I was taking a break. Purposely, I had not mentioned anything beforehand
about my impending trip and me not being at home for my birthday. Again I blame Shirley Valentine for my
devious plan. Mind you, I was pretty sure that apathetic Chris had not
organised anything special for me anyway, so I was glad I had taken charge of my
own celebrations.
Suddenly, I
stopped in my tracks. People walking to the boarding gate behind me, bumped
into me and tutted loudly. The enormity of what I was doing had suddenly hit
me. What on earth had possessed me to consider this unusual adventure? I knew that to feel free I had to truly
experience who I was and to give in to my inner desires. I guess I still felt it would be judged as
weird so I had kept quiet.
I love Chris but
I needed some excitement in my life. The age gap meant that we were at
different stages in our life. I had felt
stale and stuck in a rut for quite some time.
Then, out of the blue, the magic of Gran Canaria had been an
irresistible pull. I was in for a treat
and would make the most of it. The only unknown in my mind was whether I would
go back home to what I knew or just stay on and live a totally different life.
My experience of
the nude beach tomorrow would be the first leg of my adventure. To feel the sun, the sea, and the sand on my
naked body was tempting. To meet like-minded
people on the secluded beach would be even more exciting. I would never dare to do that back home so I
was super happy.
Then, of course
in a few days, after getting a bit of a tan, I will be executing the second
part of my plan, the icing on the cake.
I had had to work hard at convincing the manager of the transvestite
nightclub to let me perform as Miss Valentine.
Of course he had no idea if I was any good but he had relented, allowing
me to perform for one night only, the night of my birthday. I had brought my favourite dress, accessories
and make-up and I would dazzle him. I
had been practising with a dance teacher for nearly a year so that I could
dance like a pro.
This was my
dream come true, dancing on stage to celebrate my 50th birthday. The thought of Chris at home, sitting in his
chair, watching EastEnders, made me want to stay here. I was still a young man and I had plenty of
life in me. So watch out Las Palmas,
Miss Valentine is coming!
Régine Demuynck - May 2019
Régine, who writes under the name of Andrée Roby, published her first novella called "Double Vision" in January 2019. It was voted "Book of the month for April 2019" by the publisher Tredition. She is currently writing a sequel called "Failed Vision".
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