Poetic Revelations for When You Realize the Irritating Inner-child inside you Needs Kicking in the Butt for Making You think you Gave up Your Superpowers.
Someone’s watching. There’s a presence. Like something blowing softly at the back of my neck on a sweltering hot day but I can’t sense it yet. I don’t ask who it is because it’s that little girl in my head, again. I know her but I don’t know it yet. I watch her watch me react to the stares of my partner, my mother, my in-laws and the neighbors. They point fingers. I am sick, unappealing, inhuman. I pick up a rock and SMASH the heads of bullies but I actually don’t, because I can’t because I’m powerless. She watches, indignant, silent and sad. “ I don’t want to live without my mommy!” My child of eight says between sobs when I try to slash my wrists. ͠͠ 1,2,3,4. Shhhhh… You are now in the center of the cyclone . ͠ It’s quite something. All the yings and yangs and chi and chakras running like mad chicken fleeing a coup when the doctors tell me I can’t live. You see of course I can go on living, but what they’re telling me is that I can’t really be ALIVE. ...